Oops

Completely left out five people who mean a lot to be at the moment. Which is probably a good thing because I hate having to make that kind of choice.

1. Everyone
2. I
3. Know
4. Who isn't
5. Crap.

There you go.

Oh Sod It I Might As Well

TEN things you wish you could say to TEN different people like now:
10. You're definitely overreacting.
9. You might be underreacting.
8. If I had to change my hair colour and style for some reason I would make it like yours.
7. You are, on this occasion, wrong.
6. I used to feel superior to you, and I appreciate you so much more now I don't.
5. Seriously, what the hell happened to you?
4. Thanks for recognising that.
3. You're a lot better than you get credit for.
2. You are admirably genuine.
1. I borrowed your iPod to listen to guilty pleasure music, I hope you don't mind.

NINE things about yourself:
9. I had so much trouble with the above exercise. I don't have enough interesting secret thoughts about people.
8. I, like Harry, have a simultaneously high and low opinion of myself.
7. I feel like I'm daydreaming about ninety percent of the time.
6. I get very sentimental about the past.
5. I am the second most ticklish person I know. If someone mentions the word 'tickle' I tense up.
4. I love long car journeys.
3. I love the walk to and from school, but I know I pull weird facial expressions depending on the mood of the song I'm listening to.
2. I have a good memory for song lyrics. It's useless but fun.
1. Ultimately, things always seem to turn out ok.

EIGHT ways to win your heart:
8. Be kind and genuine.
7. Be calmer than me.
6. Be at least a bit intelligent.
5. Be romantic.
4. Don't have overly-styled hair.
3. Be a better singer than me.
2. Think about things.
1. Make good memories.

SEVEN things that cross your mind a lot:
7. Me
6. Amusing observations on life.
5. Dreams for the future.
4. Love and soppy romantic crap.
3. Books/ films/ television.
2. School.
1. Hypothetical scenarios.

SIX things you do before you fall asleep:
6. Make sure the laptop is turned off.
5. Pyjamify myself if I have not already.
4. Yell 'Goodnight!'
3. Pace idly around my room.
2. Listen to music or read.
1. Daydream.

FOUR things you see right now:
4. Special 'Complaint' post-it notes given to me by my parents.
3. Many mugs.
2. Colouring pencils.
1. An origami panda.

THREE songs you listen to often:
3. Leaving on a Jet Plane
2. Accidentally in Love
1. Chasing Cars

TWO things you want to do before you die:
2. Fall in love.
1. Go places, see things.

ONE confession:
1. Even when I'm stressing on the outside, my life is always pretty great.

Can't Believe I Am Finding Time To Do This

Oh Drama, you crazy, crazy subject. Tears and traverse and tummy aches and transitions and ten percent. That's a hell of a lot of alliteration.

In good news from today, I no longer have to do a forward roll off three people while doing a monologue, I had a very good lunch and am about to have a yummy dinner. Also we improved, apparently, in the space of twenty four hours, which bodes well.

I hope everyone who is well feels better and that everyone who is stressed feels less stressed, and I for one plan to spend tomorrow with my face (and other people's costumes) not quite as smeared with mascara. I am writing this blog post in the brief window between getting home and eating my aforementioned yummy dinner, then relaxing, I hope, for the remainder of the evening.

Warning

Yesterday I purchased some felt-tip pens in a tub from Paperchase, identical to the ones I gave Jane for her birthday. This is because at heart I am still a five-year-old and would like to forget about exams and instead draw pretty pictures.

When I sat down for a while to try them out yesterday, it was very hard to get the lids off the pens (I had to use my teeth for some of them) and very hard to put them back on. So much so that in trying to put the lids back on I made my hands bleed from tiny Jesus-like puncture wounds in the palms of my hands. I apologise for any similar injuries I may have caused, and urge you to press the pen lids against a table to close them, not palms.

Tomorrow, as the last Monday of January, is supposedly the most depressing day of the year. I don't know if it can beat last Monday's drama rehearsal until seven o'clock in a dark and creepy school, which, in retrospect, was actually kind of fun. Oh well, at least Glee is on, and I can draw pretty pictures so long as I am careful.

Note to Self

In future, I will not, no matter how stressed or upset I am, post angry blog posts about my Dad. Because, once the argument is resolved entirely and I no longer harbour any feelings of resentment, I will feel really guilty and therefore delete the blog post.

So here is a blog post to fill the absence of one I wrote and deleted. Hello, world.

I Concur.

I deleted the rather dull and pointless blog post of yesterday, for the purpose of fully agreeing with Jane's sentiments with regard to the Drama exam.

As we draw ever closer to the Day of Reckoning, I begin to have the teeniest of sneaky suspicions that we are absolutely and unarguably doomed, and that Tuesday was by no means the first of the inevitable panic-driven meltdown lessons. Tensions are running high, and I suspect that I do not have enough awareness of what I am supposed to be doing to necessarily make valid suggestions to the group. Particularly as Music and Movement combines the two things I am worst at; music....and movement. Throw a few mathematical equations in there and you've got yourselves a party.

Or, quite possibly, we're being melodramatic and actually it's all going to turn out ok, as will the History resit that I have not done enough revision for. I miss Lady Windermere's Fan.

In good news, I went to Morrisons to buy HP6 on DVD, but it was 14.99, so I bought The Notebook for 3.99 instead. Bargain. That's tonight's procrastination sorted.

I Don't Speak French

Today is a wonderful, beautiful day. Not only because it is Jane's birthday (although that, I have to say, is mighty attractive) but because from now on I can just let the funky music do the talking, talking.

After two and a half hours of sitting in room forty with six other French resit-ers, and some annoyingly lucky year twelves/ consortium kids doing the new specification exam, which is half an hour shorter, it is over. The fact that we got little mp3 players for the listening part of the exam back in June kind of implied that we would get them this time, but no, we had loud, clunky individual cassette players. Which is just counter-productive, because you disturb everyone with all the really loud clicking of buttons that you have to press three times to get to work, and our half of the room became a trip hazard of wires.

Meanwhile, the new specification people had their silent mp3 players that are easy to use and disturb no-one. Never mind though, because NEVER AGAIN. I can parler francis for fun, pas pour les examens.

Also drama yesterday was tears and tension cakes, but I reckon if we listen to enough inspirational music we might get through it.

My Ears Are Warming Up

Just went for a very nice walk around the park in the snow. It was like Narnia but without the talking animals (that I know of, anyway, none of them spoke to me.) And now my ears are warming up, hence the title of the blog.

Somehow spent the entire day, apart from the horrible French practice paper and finishing my SWED questions for Drama, listening to Chasing Cars by Snow Patrol.

I have only done the listening part of the French paper and I have to do the rest by tomorrow but it is so unbearably boring it makes me want to individually tear off all of my limbs and throw them at the Eiffel Tower. I like the language, the food and the adorable petit-filou-advert type school children, I just ABSOLUTELY hate the way it's examined.

I also was supposed to see Avatar yesterday but it was fully booked, so I spent my evening feeling somewhat disappointed and like the whole day had been a let down. That was until 11.30pm when I thought of an idea for my English Coursework while reading 1984. Over and out.

Stage Fright

Well, it's another snow day, and last night I had a horrible nightmare about the Drama exam.

We were performing, and attempting to move between scenes, one of which was a giant flock in the car park outside the Drama studio. The audience were getting restless, and then we did a scene that I had never rehearsed before, which involved all of us sitting down in the middle of a circle of audience while holding coat hangers. I wasn't sure if I was even meant to be in the scene, but seeing as we had nothing I improvised. The audience were not paying ANY attention, and just talking amongst themselves loudly with no notice of what was happening on stage, so we started saying to one another 'The audience are just talking. They're not even watching. What do we do?' Then I burst into tears and yelled at the audience, shouting 'You're not even listening to us,' but no-one except Sheps heard.

Then we had to do another scene which had Katie in it, who doesn't do Drama, and also the guy who played Bootstrap Bill and was one of the fathers in Mamma Mia. He ruined the scene by getting his lines wrong. Then the play ended and we were all agreeing it had been a total disaster, and everyone was going to go and get drunk and drown their sorrows, but not me because I wasn't invited. And for some reason Laura wanted me to watch a very bad animated film and then yelled at me because I didn't want to watch it.

My subconscious may be informing me that Drama-wise, we are currently a little bit screwed.
Sherlock Holmes today, in much happier news.

Cold, Tired and Hungry

Ten minutes until my early dinner because my mother is gallivanting off to a meeting of some kind. That's one of the three on my checklist sorted prior to actually getting down to some serious History courseworking.

As for cold, well, hopefully warm food will help, and maybe being trapped in a frozen cocoon of History sheets will actually encourage me to do work, as opposed to continuing to waste time. If that fails, fingerless gloves.

And finally, tired. Hopefully warm food followed by coffee will put a stop to that, or at least postpone it until such a time when I can legitimately allow myself to sleep, with my History coursework safely memory penned and printed.

I may have got to the stage of delirious exhaustion which is always noticable by using unnecessarily long words and speaking in a slightly slurred way. Which are also, strangely, the symptoms of drunkenness. Clearly this is how I do 'out of it.' I should never be under sedation.
Gloves, dinner and coffee are in order, then Lyndon B. Johnson.

Go Away LBJ

883 words written out of 2000.
Apart from lunch, going downstairs for snacks, and pacing pointlessly around my room, I have spent all day sitting at the computer surrounded by ridiculously massive sheets working on this darn essay.

I have gone crazy with the orange highlighter (orange showing increased involvement in Vietnam, like Agent Orange. Yes, symbolic highlighting.)

I have resisted playing the rollercoaster game on my phone, even though I have nearly completed it, and resisted BBC iplayer, which is not to say I haven't been procrastinating, as I obviously am RIGHT now. Also, I don't understand how Sunday lunch somehow manages to last from 1.30 until 3, thus wasting precious time. It's not like we're religious and pray round the dinner table or anything.

That is all.

2010 Already. Blimey.

Happy New Year, and I have just got dressed, for some reason in a blue top and blue tights, I look like one of those blue people from Avatar, a film which I have not seen.

Had a lovely New Year sleepover avec Zanny, Jane, pizza, films and smirnoff. I have had the most chocolatey breakfast known to mankind to kick start 2010. My New Year's resolution is always to 'generally improve in all areas' which I am beginning to suspect might be too vague and overly ambitious.

So this year, rather than doing what I want to do I will do what I want to have done. For example, if I want to have read a certain book by a certain time, or to have done homework, I will do it rather than doing what I want to do, which is waste time by watching BBC iplayer, doodling, or playing the addictive rollercoaster game on my AWESOME new phone.

Yeah, right. That resolution will not happen. I have had very little sleep.